The Winning Side Read online

  Shawn knocked on the door and it opened. “Coach, I’m sorry, but you have to see this picture. It’s about Raven and it’s urgent.”

  Shawn was in the office for about fifteen minutes before he stepped out. I darted out of my seat, eager to know what happened. “What did he say? What happened? Is he going to let Raven play? What did Raven say?” I fired off several questions.

  “Take it easy, Lexi.” He motioned for me to calm down, but there was only one thing that would release the chords tightly wrapped around my stomach. Shawn ran his hand over his short hair. Based on the disappointment he was visibly wearing, I knew it wasn’t good.

  “Coach wasn’t happy. Pissed about the whole thing. It’s all over Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, so there’s no making up any stories about this. Raven has to come clean about what happened, but the good news is this picture,” he held up his phone, “might just save his ass.”

  I exhaled and then took a step back, realizing I was totally in Shawn’s space. “Thanks for speaking up, Shawn. Raven needs all the help he can get.”

  Shawn sat with us as we waited for the verdict. I bounced my leg to an offbeat rhythm and tried to keep my mind focused on positive thoughts. But no matter how hard I tried, visuals of the articles I’d read on the internet about Raven’s past incidents inundated me and my sister’s words rang loud in my ear. Raven will end up in jail.

  I hated that I couldn’t be there to save him — to keep him away from Jared and the hoes that were dying for a piece of him. I had promised I’d be there for him and I wasn’t. Now, he was paying for the mistakes he’d made. With every decision, there are consequences — good or bad. I could only hope that Raven’s consequences would tilt to the favorable side. The walls around me closed in, but I pushed them back, willing myself to stay strong. Raven needed me and I had to believe that there was hope for him. For us. This wasn’t the end of his career.

  It seemed like an eternity had passed before the door finally opened again. Raven walked out of the coach’s office and closed the door behind him. I got up and rushed to his side. His face was blotched with red marks and his entire body slumped toward the floor. With each step he took, his frame shrunk until he was nearly my height. His eyes glazed over and it looked like he’d been crying. My heart immediately ached for him as I prepared for the worst.

  “What did he say?” I placed my hands on his forearms, holding onto him for support, even though he was the one that needed it more than me.

  Raven’s eyes drifted to the floor and he sighed. “I’ve been dispelled from the game.”

  “Shit,” Shawn muttered.

  “Oh, no.” Shelby covered her mouth. “Josh is going to be pissed.”

  “It’s okay,” I quickly assured him. “It’s just one game.”

  “What about the team?” Shawn asked the question I had wanted to ask, but was too scared to.

  Raven looked up slowly, devastation looming in his eyes. Everything seemed to stop as I waited for him to answer. I counted the seconds and said a silent prayer that he wouldn’t say the words that would end it all for him.

  “I-I’m on probation. For now,” he said, as if the words ripped a hole in his chest.

  “Damn it.” Shawn slammed his hand on a table next to him and continued muttering a string of expletives. “It’s alright, man.” Shawn stood and hooked an arm around Raven. “You had a good year and you’ll be back on that field in no time.”

  “That’s right.” I straightened and gave him an easy smile. “We’re going to get through this little faux pas and get you back on track. Coach will see that you’re worthy of playing and will reinstate you in no time.”

  Raven’s face twisted in disbelief. “Easy for you to say. I was already on my last chance. Not sure if I get anymore.” He shucked Shawn’s arm off and shuffled past me.

  “Raven, wait.” I trekked behind him. “Don’t get discouraged. You showed Coach the picture, right?”

  He stopped and then turned to face me. “Yes, I did. I’m sorry you had to see all of that.” He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut, as if trying to wipe it away from memory. I wished I could do the same. I didn’t want to think about what else happened outside that picture. But if I knew Macy, she got what she wanted, along with whoever else, no doubt.

  “What’s done is done,” I said with a tight lip, wanting to say more but refraining myself. “But that picture might be your saving grace.”

  “Let’s hope so. I have to go in front of the ethics committee and board of admissions to see if I’m allowed to say at the university.”

  “Oh.” I pressed my lips together, unsure of what else to say. This was worse than I thought.

  Σ

  Chapter 2

  As we exited the training facility, a school newspaper reporter immediately greeted us. Social media had done its job and now she wanted the scoop. It would be impossible to keep what happened under the radar for very long.

  “What the heck?” Shelby scampered back, bumping into Shawn. “This isn’t good.”

  “Aw, hell.” Shawn shook his head in disgust. “I freakin’ hate social media at times.”

  “Hang tight.” Shelby darted across the parking lot, leaving us to deal with the hungry-for-information journalist.

  “Is it true that you were in the hospital for alcohol poisoning and a drug overdose?” A thin, petite girl with short blonde hair and a big plastic badge marked ‘PHU Media’ shoved her phone in Raven’s face, ready to record his response.

  “No comment.” Raven raised a hand, motioning for her not to ask any more questions. Her lips turned down but she retrieved her phone. She paused as though thinking of another way to get the details, but Raven didn’t wait. He took me by the hand and pushed past her.

  A string of flashes stopped us and I quickly turned my head, protecting my eyes from the blinding light. “Will you be playing in the bowl or have you been suspended from the game?” An older man with thick-rimmed glasses pressed his pen to his pad, ready to capture Raven’s reply.

  “Sorry, I’m not at liberty to say right now,” Raven answered. This situation would get worse before it got better. I held on to Raven’s arm as he led us in the opposite direction. Unfortunately, that didn’t stop the reporters from following us and firing question after question.

  “The hospital report said you took hydrocodone. Is that correct?” A middle-aged man wearing a polo-style shirt from a local TV station shoved a microphone in Raven’s face. A large, black camera lens focused on us, and suddenly, Raven’s stardom didn’t seem that exciting.

  Raven shook his head. “Sorry, no comment.” We stepped to the side, trying to escape the scrutiny from the heavy piece of equipment waiting to record Raven’s reaction.

  “Will you be entering into a drug rehab center?” the reporter asked, still thrusting the microphone under Raven’s nose. Raven tilted his head to the side, trying to avoid the persistent man. Several students appeared, snapping pictures with their phones while others recorded the scene. This wasn’t good. Raven didn’t need any more social media exposure. A sharp grunt released from low in his throat and I prayed that he wouldn’t do something stupid.

  “C’mon. Give him some privacy.” Shawn stepped in front of us, trying to ward off the onlookers, which was probably for the best seeing as Raven’s face was flushed and his fingers were tightly clenched.

  At that moment, the sound of tires screeching along the pavement turned our attention away from the media. It was Josh’s truck — Shelby’s timing was impeccable.

  “Get in!” Josh sat in the driver’s seat, his face in a state of panic.

  “Let’s go.” Raven grabbed my hand and we pressed through the reporters, cameras, and microphones. Shawn blocked everyone from following us, allowing us to break free. Raven opened the door and we jumped in, leaving the reporters dumbfounded and empty-handed. The door slammed shut and Josh took off, tires spinning as they struggled to grip the asphalt.

  “Damn! They’re
like freakin’ vultures,” Shelby huffed. I turned around to see the crowd of parents and fans, along with some of the football players, rush toward the front of the building. Everyone was probably wondering what the hell just happened and where Raven was going — not to the hotel with all the other players, obviously.

  “Hey, shouldn’t you be on that bus?” Raven hooked a thumb, pointing behind us.

  “I’ll have Shelby bring me back. Coach said he’d wait for me. He asked me to make sure you got home.”

  “Really?” Raven’s voice lifted in a clear indication of hope.

  “Yeah, and when I saw the TV station van pull up, bypass the players, and head straight for the athletic offices, I knew they got word. But I guess that’s no surprise since it’s on every social media site.”

  “Damn.” Raven leaned forward and covered his face with his hands. I rubbed his back, giving him a supportive and soothing touch, though I knew it would take more than my touch to ease his worries. It would take a miracle.

  “Word is out, man. Everyone knows you were in the hospital.” Josh gripped the steering wheel until the whites of his knuckles pressed through. He let out an audible sigh and shook his head. The expression held more pity than anger. It was obvious Josh had been down this beaten path before.

  “I’m so screwed.” Raven voice was thick with regret.

  “Don’t worry. I’ll call my uncle and you can talk to him.” Josh gave a quick glance over his shoulder.

  Raven lifted his head. “It’s okay. I’ll deal with this. I don’t think I need an attorney this time. Besides, your family has done enough for me.”

  Josh looked at Raven through the rearview mirror. “Don’t be hardheaded. Just talk to him. Get some advice on how to handle this situation. He helped you last time and I know he’ll be happy to talk to you. Don’t be a fool about this.”

  Raven gave a slight nod, but by the way his hands clenched into fists and his body stiffened, it was evident that he didn’t want to have a conversation with Josh’s uncle. Regardless of whatever demon Raven was battling, Josh was right. Raven needed sound advice and since he didn’t have a father to lean on, Josh’s uncle was probably the best person to confide in, aside from his mother, Trish. Too bad my sister wasn’t on Raven’s team, she’d be damn good for a situation like this.

  Silence filled the cabin of the truck once again and I thought about the best way to support Raven. I didn’t have all the answers or the best advice; being there for him was the best I could offer, and I would do that.

  We made it to the apartment in record time without media trucks or wannabe paparazzi following us. We got out, while Josh and Shelby stayed behind. Raven grabbed his bags and we headed toward the stairs.

  “Hey, Raven,” Josh called, leaning out the window.

  Raven adjusted the strap of his bag and looked over his shoulder. “Yeah, man?”

  “If you need to talk, call me.” Josh gave a sympathetic, man-to-man offer — one you’d expect from a true friend. Josh was a good guy and I hope he could reason with Raven. “I’ll give my uncle a heads up.”

  “Thanks, man.”

  ***

  Raven went straight to his room and closed the door. I hated that he shut me out, but I figured he needed to be left alone until he was ready to talk. He’d been through a lot today and the news was less than satisfying. The only positive was the picture that Shawn had shown Coach. It made my stomach turn and left a sour taste in my mouth, but if it saved his football career, I didn’t care who saw it. I might have looked like the stupid girl that ran back for more abuse, but I didn’t care. I loved Raven and I would stand by his side, no matter what.

  I sat on the couch, flipping through the TV channels, when my phone buzzed.

  Shelby: Is Raven okay?

  Me: He’s in his room.

  Shelby: Just give him some space. He’ll come around. I’m going to stay with Amber. Let me know if you need anything.

  Me: Ok. Thanks.

  Just as I was about to set my phone down, a picture of Delaney and me flashed on the screen. I answered it quickly, not wanting to wake Raven in case he was sleeping.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, how’s Raven?” Delaney’s voice was soothing to hear. I hadn’t talked to her in a few days — only sending her a text when we left the hospital last night.

  I took a deep breath and relaxed against the pillows. It seemed like the past twenty-four hours had been one big blur. “He’s doing okay medically, I guess. When it comes to football… not so good. He won’t be able to play in the bowl game.”

  Delaney gasped. “Oh shit. That sucks.”

  “Yeah, I know, but it’s probably for the best. He’s really weak right now. He could get seriously hurt.” I made sure to keep my voice low; I didn’t want Raven to hear me talk about him.

  Delaney muttered something about Raven in the background and I couldn’t help my curiosity.

  “Where are you?”

  “Luke’s apartment.”

  “Tell him not to say anything. I’m not sure it’s been announced.” Delaney loved to talk and I didn’t want to contribute to the rumor mill.

  “Okay. Hey, Luke, don’t say anything…they haven’t made an announcement yet,” Delaney said.

  Loud and clear through the line, Luke said, “Okay.”

  “So, are you going to stay there?” Delaney asked.

  I looked at our Star Wars Christmas tree, wishing I’d never left. The present I had bought for Raven was missing. I silently wondered if he had opened it or threw it away. I couldn’t even think about telling him what my mom did to the lingerie he had bought me. So much had happened in the last ten days. Nothing like I’d planned.

  “Yeah, I guess. Until the dorms open next week.” I tried to remember what day it was and when the halls would reopen for spring semester. My head wasn’t cooperating and it was probably due to lack of sleep and food.

  “That’s good. Raven needs you.”

  “I’m going to be here for him. Do whatever I can to help him get on the right track. I-I love him, Delaney. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for him.” I wiped the tears that suddenly appeared.

  “I know you do. I’ll check on you tomorrow. If you need me, I’ll be there.”

  “Thanks, Delaney. I appreciate it. Tell Luke I said thanks for everything.”

  “I will.” She giggled at the incoherent words my brother muttered in the background. “I gotta go. You brother obviously wants something.”

  I shook my head, trying not to think about what that ‘something’ he wanted was. I was happy for them, and I hoped Luke would be able to tame her wild ass. She definitely needed him.

  “Okay, call me later. Bye.”

  “Bye.” Her voice lilted in elation and I hung up the phone quickly.

  I lifted my legs onto the couch and pulled a blanket over me. I snuggled against the cold leather and closed my eyes, wishing I was in the next room with Raven, feeling his warmth instead of my own. Tonight I had a feeling I’d be all alone. But it didn’t have to be that way. If only Raven would let me in and allow me to help him in his troubled world. If only he’d open his heart fully to me instead of keeping it guarded with defensive plays.

  ***

  A faint sound woke me. I blinked a few times, trying to focus on where the noise originated. A blue screen with a rainbow border at the bottom illuminated the TV. ‘Off the air’ flashed across the screen in large type. It took me a second to process the message. Did TV stations actually turn off anymore? I grabbed my phone and glanced at the time. Five minutes after one in the morning.

  I checked my messages, seeing that I’d missed a call from Raven’s mom several hours ago. I wasn’t sure if he’d called her, but I decided to give her a ring later. Part of me was relieved that my mom hadn’t tried to call me, while another part wished my dad would’ve checked on me. Based on the way he looked at me when I left, I had a feeling he was gravitating toward accepting my decision to be with Raven. I set my
phone on the coffee table and walked toward Raven’s room.

  I cracked the door open and peeked into the room. The street light filtered in through the window, casting a shadow on Raven. He sat in a chair located in the corner of his room, resting his head against his hand. He looked so weak, vulnerable, and ready to cave with just one touch.

  “Raven?” I entered slowly, approaching him with caution. “Are you okay?”

  He didn’t answer, keeping his gaze focused on the ground. The hurt, the pain, the disappointment… he wore each of them visibly, even in the dark. Every part of me hurt for him. I only wished there was something I could do to make everything better.

  I knelt in front of him, trying to connect my eyes with his. I hated seeing him like this. It created an agony inside shared only between us. Our connection existed on a deeper level, not just intimately or physically, but soulfully. Regardless of his refusal to acknowledge me, I wasn’t giving up.

  “Is there anything I can do for you?” I placed my hand on his leg and left it there for a minute. He didn’t move, his body remaining stiff like a statue. When I felt it was safe, I rubbed his leg in a slow stroke, kneading it with a deep touch. “Tell me, babe. I can’t stand seeing you this way. Tell me what I can do.”

  His eyes met mine and I saw the walls of defeat that were surrounding him.

  Consuming him.

  Piece by piece.

  I wanted to tear them down, one by one.

  Unfortunately, I knew I couldn’t do it for him. He had to do it on his own. If he was going to get through this setback, he’d have stand tall and make the decision to press forward — leave the past behind and start making better choices.

  “I’m here for you.” I spoke each word whole-heartedly, hoping he sensed my sincerity.

  “Are you?” He glanced at me, warily.

  “Of course I am.” Confusion laced my voice and I quickly retreated, knowing I had to tread carefully. Words were Raven’s worst enemy and they knew how to take him down faster than a two-hundred and fifty-pound linebacker. “I said I’d be here for you, no matter what.”